Managing Expectations

After a seemingly interminable wait, I made the trip back to the neurologist today to review the results of my latest round of tests. During the last couple weeks, he also reviewed my latest MRI and he shared some thoughts on it as well.

As a refresher, my neurologist sent me to the hospital to undergo both auditory and somatosensory evoked potential tests. These tests are designed to measure the response times of nerve impulses. The auditory test measures nerve strength from the ear to the brain stem, while the somatosensory test measures electrical signals from various parts of the body to the spinal cord and then up to the brain.

The results are in….there’s nothing right in my left brain, and there’s nothing left in my right brain! (rim shot, please!)

All jokes aside, I received mixed news today. Mixed news seems to be a way of life in the medical field. I am sure it stems from a desire to not have patients get too high or too low emotionally, but it can get frustrating at times.

All the measurements from my nerve testing came back in the ‘normal’ ranges. That is exceptional news! Most of the signal measurements are taken as impulses travel through specific systems. The impulses can be measured as they enter and exit each system, and the elapsed time between the two measurements represents the potential for the nerve to function. It is this measurement that repeatedly came back in ‘normal’ ranges from stimuli at each ear, both wrists and each ankle.

While this is positive news without a doubt, I have to keep in mind that the test only measured potential. The nerves could still regrow incorrectly or ‘plug in’ to the wrong tissue. Then I would have a nerve that works, but still a loss of functionality.

My fiancee and I discussed this discrepancy with my neurologist and he offered the honest opinion that he did not expect me to fully recover all physical functionality (back to pre-surgery levels). In his opinion, the evoked potential test results indicate that I will continue to see progress in my recovery, but they were not to be misinterpreted as a guarantee of how far I might advance.

The neurologist was also less positive about my most recent MRI than my neurosurgeon was. The previously unexplained spot seemed to worry him, and his office is scheduling a new MRI for November. Today, the spot was labeled as possible tumor remnants, scar tissue or even necrosis (dead brain tissue damaged during surgery). Since he is just becoming involved in my case, the neurologist thought it was appropriate to monitor the spot closely for the remainder of the year.

Where does all this information leave me? Good question!

I am undoubtedly getting better as noted in ‘Weekly Wins‘. I believe I will continue that trend for the foreseeable future.

How much better will I get? I can’t distract myself with those concerns. I can manage expectations that today is better than yesterday. I have faith that tomorrow will be better than today.